im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
