My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
You ate ashes out of my bong
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
