YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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