I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Randomize
