why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Randomize
