even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
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