In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Randomize
