you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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