Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
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