everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
