So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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