Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize
