This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Houston, we have a squirter
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
