just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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