He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
