Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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