Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
too bad you live with your parents still
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
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