Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
he fucked my hip out of place.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Randomize
