6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
