he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Randomize
