THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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