rhymes with "ouble enetration"
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize