Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
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