1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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