4 words: hood of his car
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
