I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
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