A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize