Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
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