I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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