I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
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