True but thats because hes a fetus.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Randomize