why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
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