we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Randomize
