were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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