i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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