ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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