dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
