can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
Randomize
