If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Terrible idea I love it
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
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