why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Randomize