I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
the room spins SO much faster in panama
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Randomize
