we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
17 year olds will be the death of me.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Randomize
