if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
