He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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