Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
zippers are such a cool invention
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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