at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
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