yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
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I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
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We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
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