Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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