I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Randomize
