i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Randomize
